Sunday, May 25, 2008

Haiku Movie Reviews!

Ok, time for a few new haiku movie reviews since it's been a while. For those of you just joining us, a haiku is a traditional 17 syllable Japanese poem. And for some of these films that may be 16 syllables more than they deserve.

Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

Old man Indy here:
Such countless wasted chances.
So disappointing.

Iron Man

Things go boom, explode.
Power armor for big jerk?
Better than hoped!

Cloverfield

Giant monster stomps?
Godzilla wants his film back.
Blair Witch says: "Me too."

Jumper

Darth Hayden can't act.
In Ann Arbor, no one asks
Big questions like: "How?"

The Forbidden Kingdom

Jet Li and Jackie!
You hope they won't sell out here.
Groooooan. How surprising.

Harold and Kumar Escape Guantanamo Bay

Good actors, bad film.
Better off with White Castle.
Pray for no sequel.

The Ruins

Supposed to scare you:
"Little Shop of Horrors
Mexican party."

I really need to see some better movies...

1 comment:

Carole McDonnell said...

The cloverfield haiku made me smile. I soo hope Forbidden Kingdom isn't as bad as you say. Alas, though, when I saw the little European sidekick kid I DID begin to lose hope. But cute sidekick kids occur in Asian flicks so.... will withhold judgement for the nonce. Great reviews. - C